There is a very famous quote saying “Happiness is like a butterfly: the more you chase it, the more it will elude you, but if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder.” However according to a growing number of psychologists, this isn’t true. You can choose to be happy. You can chase the butterfly and make it sit on your shoulder. We can pursue happiness by hindering negative thoughts and emotions such as resentment, anger and pessimism and fostering emotions such as serenity, gratitude and forgiveness. Here are some of the many keys to the gate of happiness and bliss:
# Stop worrying:
We often worry about how people might perceive us or what might or might not happen or what we will or won’t be able to achieve. We decide it’s easier to reluctant, wait for the right moment, to explore more alternatives and to think a little while longer. In the meantime, weeks, months, years pass us by along with our dreams. Done let your fears hold you back, everything you’ve ever wanted, ever imagined, ever dreamed of, start working on it today. Take the first step and get going. Time doesn’t wait for anyone. Instead of worrying what might happen, be courageous enough to face the consequences. At least that way, you won’t regret not trying. Today is the most precious asset you own, the only thing you should worry about it wasting it.
#Foster Friendship and Forgiveness:
The best antidote to melancholy and unhappiness is friendship with people who love you and care about you. People, who have the strongest circle of friends, live the longest. The selfish and individualistic world today suffers from penurious social connections. That is one of the reasons people today are unhappy and not satisfied. Make quality friends and you will realise how content you become in the company of people you can share your feelings with, people you can laugh and cry with. Most importantly, holding a grudge against someone or harbouring criticisms doesn’t make anyone happy. To be truly happy, you have to let go of the hatred and foster forgiveness. The bitterness and resentment will only affect your physical and mental health. Forgiving someone, might just give one another good friend.
# Relinquish the Self-Pity:
Life kicks you around many times and takes unexpected turns not in your favour. Most of us tend to whine, sulk and blame life in such situations. But what we fail to realise is whining about our problems only makes you feel worse, not better. If something brings you down, don’t waste time sulking and complaining about it. Put those efforts into making the situation better instead. Don’t think about what’s wrong; think what you can do to make everything better. Friends may give you a shoulder to cry on, but you have got to stop self-pitying yourself and put your life back together again. At such times, the best option is to count your blessings. Practising gratefulness is particularly a key to happiness. Be grateful for what you have in life instead of crying over your loss. Take responsibility when things go wrong instead of blaming it on others. Taking responsibility of your own self will make you focus on doing things better next time, it will empower you. And when you get better, you will get happier too.
#Engross in meaningful activities and work towards life goals:
Making a list of all your life goals and taking baby steps towards them is very encouraging and happy-inducing. Believing that life is good is an essential component of happiness and it helps you progress towards your goals in life. Absorbing the mind in meaningful activities that challenge your abilities helps you believe you are moving forward with your life goals and it bestows a feeling of happiness within us.
#Thwart Negative feelings and thoughts:
Steer clear of negative thoughts and people. You can achieve this by indulging in activities such as Yoga, meditation and other relaxation exercises that help calm the mind and soul. Identify all your negative thoughts and feelings. That makes it easier to counteract them. At times, reading books related to the true meaning of happiness can also have a positive effect. Stop caring about negative thoughts and people.
It is difficult to get your mind of all your life problems and being happy, but the real key to happiness is to let life know you are not just a survivor, you are a fighter. And you are stronger than anything life throws your way.
#Stop insisting on the best:
Life isn’t perfect and we can’t always have what we want. There are two types of decision makers. There are Satisficers who make a decision once their criteria are met. When they find a car or the pasta sauce that has the qualities they want, they’re satisfied. Then there are Maximizers who want to make the best possible decision. Even if they see a car or a pasta sauce that meets their needs, they can’t make a decision until they’ve examined every option. Satisficers tend to be happier than maximizers. Remember that sometimes good enough is good enough.