A better India is what we hope for, wish for. People say that times have changed, the country has modernized. Women are at power with men. There are very less things that girls cannot do which boys can. I agree. But when elders of the family strike us with the idea of getting married, the concept of women empowerment goes through a crumble! “We are going to get you married after you complete your graduation. After that, do whatever you want in your in-laws house.” Exactly how many of us have heard the same sentence in different languages? I have heard it, and I can bet many of you have too, and trust me, I know exactly the feeling you have!
“But I want to complete my studies first!”, “I want to do so much more than this!”, “I do not care what the neighbors say!”, “I want to work!” and “I’m not going to marry your friend’s son, please!” very familiar thoughts, which rage a storm in your worked-up brain. The sad truth is, we are brought up under the “traditional Indian culture”. Girls are supposed to be subtle like a lamb. We do not raise voices in front of elders. We bow down our heads to their decisions and we say, “I am happy if it makes my family happy.” And this is what I think – utter nonsense all this is!
I have a few, very simple to-the-point questions. First, did we give school fourteen years and college three to four years, giving education in total approximately eighteen years of our lives just to get married in the end and do nothing else? Second, do we want to be entirely dependent on someone else even just to buy our sanitary napkins? Thirdly, marriage is a big step in our lives. So don’t we get to decide when and with whom should we get married to because in the end it’s our lives? And I know, I am not the only one with these questions. But how many of us really have the guts to face our family with these questions? How many of us would really go against our family to make ourselves happy for the right cause? How many of us would snatch what is written in our destiny from the people who are preventing it from coming true?
Before I proceed, I would like to enlighten you with some facts, which might be of some help. Studies have shown and have proved that in comparison to working women, housewives undergo a lot more stress which in turn causes depression. “An empty mind is a devil’s workshop” – exactly what I’m trying to say. In comparison to working women, housewives have fewer things to keep themselves busy with. Most of their time will be spent on looking after the family, monitoring their children and other household things. The question is, till how long will they do the same old thing? At one point of time they will feel frustrated staying in that limited horizon, doing what they are told to do. To think about it deeply, they will become slaves to their own household. Whereas, a working lady will explore new things every day; with each day will come a new challenge. So which is better? Waking up in the morning guessing what the day has in store for you, or just knowing that it’s just going to be another day like the rest? I don’t think this is what any girl aspires to be. So if you do not want to, then do not do it. It’s high time you took a stand for yourself. Do whatever you want to do, be whatever you want to be, it’s your life!
I know what you might be thinking. It’s not that easy, is it? Going against your loved ones is not simple. Question them, would they be happy to see you unhappy on the day of your marriage? Would they be happy seeing you not getting the respect you deserve because you are just another housewife? Would they be happy seeing you helpless and stressed? Would they not want you to live your dream? After all, they were the ones who said you are special, is it not? Then will they be happy on seeing you ordinary?
What are you afraid of? I would say that take advantage of the fact that your family just cannot stay disappointed at you for long! Don’t just disappoint yourself and your abilities for the sake of your “culture” and “tradition”. There is this saying, “When you educate a man, you educate a man. When you educate a woman, you educate an entire generation.” Just imagine the scene where your child would feel proud to introduce you to his/her acquaintances, a scene where you will be your child’s inspiration. Stand up for your future, your dreams, and your happiness. Believe that you were born to be great, and you shall achieve greatness.